Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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