So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Randomize