she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize