So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
