I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
