I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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