I'm really into asian looking animals
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
