pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
