New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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