does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize