It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
