so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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