I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
