just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
