Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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