Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
All I want is dick and wine.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Randomize
