I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm gonna fight the coyote
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