I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize