shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
