he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
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Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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