I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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