I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
