At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
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his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
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Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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