Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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