You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
NoShamevember. You game?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Randomize
