walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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