I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize