So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
