The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I need mimosas to revive my soul
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
