the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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