escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
