The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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