And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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