My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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