Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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