Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
