you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Randomize
