but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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