no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
