32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
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Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
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Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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