Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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