my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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