The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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