My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
