You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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