at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
