Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
