the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
