please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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