Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
