my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
