You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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